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Bernard Dov Wisser's

Journal of advice, opinion, and ventilation...also raps about art, spirituality, being a human being and everything else....



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Tuesday, February 18, 2003
 
IT'S NEW EVERY WEEKDAY: An Abstract Art Piece by Bernard;
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How I Became an Ugly American

I always thought of myself as sort of homely in a very good-looking way. Now I feel ugly, though my inner-beauty has increased by leaps and bounds, through the years. Naturally, everything is relative, and I realize that might not be saying a lot! However, I have never felt ugly before, and it's all George W's fault.

I should tell you that I am an American expatriate who has been living in The Netherlands for the last 18 years. When I first came here, upon hearing I was an American some of the Dutch would raise their brows, their laugh wrinkles would become exposed, and smiling eyes would punctuate, what they were about to say. Then they would come out with something on the order of, "Oh, You're American-- I suppose you think everything is bigger, and better, and more spectacular, in America...."

"You are right!" I would answer. "I do think most things are bigger and more spectacular in America, but better, some things are better, and some things are worse. Your social system is a lot more compassionate and enlightened. You are a lot more tolerant, and because your vice laws and drug laws are liberal your jails are a lot emptier than ours are. But, your electric outlets are screwed on the middles of your walls (they are not even built in), so your walls have electric wires dangling from them, which makes it hard on your interior decorators...." Anyway, with eighty percent of the Dutch challengers I laid that rap on, my honesty and humor, paid off; for in most cases they stopped patronizing me with that American stereotype.

But now, like I said, I feel ugly. When strangers hear I am an American, I get all kinds of weird reactions, but probably not as bad as how people use to react to lepers. Most of the time now, people frown, and quickly turn their attention to someone else. Surprisingly, the most frequent reaction I get is my new acquaintances seems at a loss for words, or embarrassed, sometimes they seem frustrated. After that, they are cool and have little to do with me.

I think their speech blocks, are due to thinking all Americans are as thick headed as their President, so what good would it do to hold a discussion. I surmise this, for upon hearing I am against a war with Iraq (although I detest Saddam Hussein) they come alive again, and we can then carry on a normal conversation.

What can we Americans expect? George W. gets in office, and in no time at all breaks a deal with the North Koreans on nuclear disarmament, and then paints them as one of the "Axis of Evil". Then he calls them down for selling weapons, and missiles to pay energy bills, or the like, and refuses to hold a dialogue with them until they change their evil ways. Surprise! The Koreans have restarted their nuclear program and in a few years will have 90 or so nukes with missile systems to deliver them. Now, they are a far greater danger to the world than Saddam. On account of that my Dutch neighbors see George W. as being, militaristic, arrogant and perhaps a bit mad.

How about Kyoto. The American Administrations pressured the European countries to take on more of a share of lowering their dirty energy output, than they initially were ready to, so America wouldn't have to lower their share as much as they were requested to. Then, when it came time for signing Kyoto George W. announced America wouldn't sign it for it was economically unfeasible during the current downturn in the American economy, and in his gobblygook he reasoned that it would threaten our security to do so. The Dutch like most Americans want to leave a livable world behind for their progeny so you can imagine how that went down with them, especially when George W's explaination sounded like one of a mad hatter..

My Dutch friends could guess what was coming down the road when George W. bullied the Russians into allowing America to break the Salt treaty. They know that most U.S scientist knowledgeable in such things, who are not beholden to the government and the defense complex, say the only thing the developement of an defensive anti-ballistic missile will succeed in, is giving hugh contracts to the defense industry. They know better, than scaring Russia and making them lose face on the slight chance America might succeed, and can't believe the Americans in their arrogance now expect the Russians to back them in the UN. The same goes with China. America tells them you touch Taiwan and you'll be eyeball to eyeball with us, many years after we had agreed to a one China policy, and we still desire China's support in the UN Security Council.

The Dutch I talk with find it laughable that Colin Powell tried to make a case that Saddam Hussein would give weapons of mass destruction to fundamentalist terrorist that cast aspersions on the cruel dictators hypocritical form of Islam. It is no secret those very same terrorists always desired to overthrow Saddam and install a Taliban type of regime in Iraq. Saddam may be evil but he's not stupid about survival. Yet, who knows if he was desperate enough what he might do for revenge. A self fufilling prophesy like that gives goose bumps to the Dutch people I know. Me too!

So George W. I want to thank you for transforming me into an ugly American, and thanks, for the polls in Europe that show the British and European public feel America is the greatest menace in world today, greater even than Iraq, or the North Koreans. Well, anyway I guess I should also thank you for keeping me working and going out less to cafés and social gatherings. Maybe a president shouldn't be expected to make me proud to be an American, but could you lay-off embarrasing me. Take some anti-greed and aggression pills--would you! By the way, would it be too much to ask for you to stop strutting around smirking with your jaw out and your chest puffed up like America's own Mussolini--you might be surprised how much that alone increases the antipathy towards our country.


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Volume 1, issue 16, Feb.18, 2003.